Forgiveness
by mon-petit-pois
Summary: Everyone knows Leroy Jethro Gibbs is nearly impossible to break. But there is a man out there willing to attempt it, and he knows Gibbs' weakness. His family. She said he was the closest thing she had to a father, and she was right. Now she's not safe.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: IMPORTANT! PLEASE READ ThiS! I was iffy about this fic. I'm sort of worried about how it will be received. It was just a plot bunny that would not go away, no matter how I tried. I want to just warn you right off the bat, this story contains rape. If this subject bothers you in any way, please do not read! It's sort of a disturbing subject, I do not know how I will be able to bring myself to write "the scene" because it took me a while just to get the courage to write the word. Yeah. So, I'm not sure how this is going to turn out, but please don't read if you don't think you want to. This is my first M story, and I almost made a new account and posted this on there. But I really don't want to wait two days. So here it goes. Oh, and, just so we are clear, this is NOT a Zibbs story. Period. I find it to be completely unnerving, because she said Gibbs is like a father to her. No matter how you think this is going to turn out, it will NOT be with Romance between Ziva and Gibbs. No offense to Zibbs fans, but I am steering clear of that ship for a good long time.

Disclaimer: nope. I was supposed to get an email when my evil plan was through and I owned NCIS... no new messages. Wait. Someone commented on my status... But nope. Not mine. _For now._

She lay in her bed, sleeping peacefully. The rain had always been like a calming lullaby for her. She had not experienced many rainstorms in Israel, but she had found that she always slept soundly on those nights. Of course, D.C. was different. In D.C., it rained often. Those nights were always the best for her.

This was one of those nights.

She went to sleep thinking everything was fine. She thought everything was normal. Just another stormy night, right?

Wrong.

But she did not know that. And so she slept, deeply, oblivious to the danger around her.

They say ignorance is bliss. Whoever "they" are, they're right.

...

Sanding his boat had a sort of therapeutic effect on him. It always had. Whenever he had troubles, he would just come down here and sand them away.

That's what he did tonight, as the rain poured down outside.

There had been a tough case. A child had been murdered by his drunk father. Gibbs could not fathom the reasons one could have for killing their own child, drunk or not. So many people had children, and so many wasted it. They had no idea how truly fortunate they were.

And so there he was, in his safe haven, building a boat and sipping bourbon from his mason jar.

Unaware that his life was about to take a turn for the worse.

...

What was that smell? She knew that smell. It was disgustingly, sickly sweet. She wanted to stop breathing it in, but she needed air...

And so she fell back to sleep. This was a different sleep, though. It was dark, black, never ending... She had no control over this sleep.

She felt herself slipping farther and farther into the dark abyss, until it swallowed her up completely.

And she was floating.

...

The first thing Ziva noticed was that she was no longer in her own bed. This surface was hard, uncomfortable. And the air around her was definitely more humid than the air in her apartment.

She was not at home.

Opening her eyes, she took a look around. The room was not very large. It looked to be about 8 by 10 feet. A heavy door was on one of the shorter walls, and she lay on a table in the middle of the room. The table and the walls were both a very depressing shade of gray. There was a small, barred window up high on the wall across from the wall with the door. The only light in the room came from a lightbulb directly above her.

And she remembered the smell. The sweet smell that meant only one thing.

Chloroform. She had been drugged.

Struggling to stay calm, she sat up and got off the bed, assessing her situation just like she had been trained. She tested the window first, but the table was bolted into the ground and the window was too high to read anyway, not to mention the heavy looking bars. Then she tried the door. She kicked, punched, and tried to ram it down. No use. It was too big, too heavy, and too _locked_.

Sighing in defeat, she sat down in the far corner. She would just have to wait until her captors came back.

...

A knock on his door startled him out of his thoughts. He heard the shattering of glass as the mason jar holding his bourbon he had knocked down shattered.

"Shoot," he murmured. Sighing, he walked up the stairs. Who did he know who would knock on his door? It was always unlocked.

It was a trick question, really. Almost everyone he knew knew that they could just walk in.

There was something suspicious in this single action. It's not like he'd ordered pizza.

Hand on his Sig, he opened the door slowly.

No one.

Stupid kids. Probably out ding-dong-ditching again. Something still didn't seem quite right, though. His famous gut was screaming at him that something was terribly wrong.

He really should have listened to it. Because the second he turned around to go back inside, he felt something collide with the back of his head.

And then there was nothing but blackness.

A/N: Dun dun dun dunnnnn. Please review if you read this! No flames, though, please. So how was the first chapter? It's short, I know. But it's only the first chapter. It's sort of like the first waffle of the batch. Always turns out bad:)

Alli


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: sorry it took so long. I have two other fics on high demand that I need to update frequently, and this one is sort of on the side. But nonetheless, here it is!

When he came to could not see, only feel. His hands were free, but he could not stand up. The surface he was lying on was bumping up and down, up and down, making it hard to maintain his balance. Not to mention the fact that he probably had a concussion. He reached up and felt the back on his head, noticing the knot that had formed there.

Well, shit.

So, he had been kidnapped. He had no idea where he was or what time it was. Maybe it was morning, maybe it was still night. Who knows how long he had been unconscious. He could tell he was in the back of a van, but where was he? Virginia? California? Hell, he could be in Mexico for all he knew!

He knew he shouldn't have opened the front door, especially that late on a Saturday night. He should have followed his gut, it had never failed him before! He was so _stupid_ to have played right into their hands.

But who was "they?" Who had kidnapped him, and why? Was it work related? He just hoped that the rest of his team was still safe in their homes, and had not found themselves in this terrible predicament he was.

He wasn't sure how long it was before the van slowed to a gradual stop, and he heard the slamming of car doors. Then a door closer to him opened, and rough hands grabbed his shoulders. At least two pairs.

Gibbs fought tooth and nail against them, but they had too much of an advantage. He was blind, concussed, and there was only one of him.

They managed to overpower him, and they guided him inside some sort of building. Gibbs memorized the turns they took, just in case he had to find his way out of here. Finally, they seemed to come to a stop at the end of a very long hallway, and he heard the jangle of keys, and the opening of a door. He was shoved forward, and then the door slammed shut and the lock clicked. He ripped off his blindfold, and gasped.

There was a table directly in front of him, bolted to the floor. A light hung over it. Further behind it, to the left, scrunched up in the corner, was Ziva David.

"Gibbs?" she asked, confused.

"Yeah. Yeah, Ziver, it's me. Did they hurt you? Are you okay?" he questioned, worried, standing up and walking over to her. She scooted out of the corner so he could sit next to her.

"Yes, I am fine. They did not hurt me. How did you get here?" she wondered.

"I answered my door, they knocked me unconscious," he recapped last night's events. Reflexively, he felt the bump on the back of his head. She reached out and felt it, looking at him.

"You probably have a concussion," she assessed.

"Yeah, I figured. How did _you_ get here?"

"I do not remember. I went to sleep in my bed, and woke up here. I think they used chloroform, I remember the smell.

"Did you see who took you?"

"No, did you?"

"Nope. You didn't even catch a glimpse of the men who threw me in here?" he asked, hoping she had seen something that could help identify who had taken them.

"No, you just woke me up. By the time I had realized what was going on they were gone."

"Any ideas as to who we might be dealin' with, Ziver?" he asked. Maybe her so-called ninja senses had picked up on something.

"No clue, Gibbs. I can tell they are meticulous, they have obviously been planning this for a while now."

"We'll just have to wait and see then," he sighed, leaning his head back against the gray wall.

"That we shall," she agreed.

They would not have to wait long, however. A little while later, they heard footsteps in the hallway, and the click of a lock. The door slowly opened, and a man walked in.

"Well, well. If it isn't the fearless Leroy Jethro Gibbs," the man sneered. Gibbs and Ziva stood up, and looked at him. Neither of them recognized him.

"And you are?" Gibbs asked.

"That is none of your concern."

"Tell us your name, or you shall die a very slow and painful death!" Ziva exclaimed.

"Now, now. We should all remain calm."

"Who are you?" Gibbs demanded.

"I am Harvy Daniels." he answered.

"I don't know you."

"No, you do not. But you know my brother, remember? You killed him!" 

"Ah. Chris Daniels. I remember," Gibbs nodded, with a hint of sadness in his voice. That was a death that Gibbs had lost more than a few nights of sleep over. The man was so young, and a marine. He had a bright future. But he had been caught up with the wrong crowd and then one day, Gibbs caught up with him. He was going to arrest him peacefully, when Chris pulled out a gun, shooting at Gibbs. It grazed his shoulder before shot Chris. There had been no other option, Gibbs had eventually been able to convince himself of that. 

"I see your memory had not faded with your old age," the man chuckled. Gibbs laughed a long with him, however fake the laugh may be.

"Only old in body, Daniels."

"You will pay for what you did to my family. After Chris's death, everything fell apart."

"He was shooting at me, what was I supposed to do?"

"Run away. Retreat. _Not _kill him!"

"There was no other choice!"

"That's just what you say to yourself to help you justify it. But there is nothing that can justify killing another human being."

"It's true. Why am I here, anyways? If you are going to kill me, that would only make you a killer as well."

"You are here for my vengeance. I won't kill you, I won't sink to _your _level. But I will _break _you, Leroy Jethro Gibbs," he gave an evil grin.

"You do not want to become a criminal, Harvy," Gibbs warned.

"Don't try to talk me out of this. The ends justify the means, Gibbs."

"I am confused," Ziva spoke up, without a hint of fear in her voice. Gibbs did not doubt that she had found herself in this situation before. "Why am I here?"

"Because, Miss David. _You _are the means."

A/N: these are pretty short chapters, sorry. But I thought this would be a good point to stop at... Mwahahaha! Anyways, please review! I need to know what you thought! Thanks to everybody who reviewed last time! And there might be some Tiva in here, but it's not the main focus.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I whined to my daddy like Veruca Salt, but he told me I would have to wait for Christmas.

"What do you mean, the means?" Gibbs asked, brow furrowed. Harvy smirked, and left the room.

"Gibbs... if he means what I think he means..." Ziva trailed off.

"Do what he says, Ziver. It's the only way to survive."

"I think he is going to make me hurt you, Gibbs!" she exclaimed, leaning against the wall and sliding down.

"Just do what he says, Ziver. Don't defy him, keep in mind we are at his mercy," Gibbs assured her, patting her shoulder.

"I will _not_ hurt you, Gibbs!" she cried again. Before Gibbs could reply, Harvy came back.

"Stand up," he ordered Ziva. She did, remembering what Gibbs had said. "Tie her wrists," Harvy said, tossing Gibbs a length of rope. Gibbs looked at it dumbfounded.

"What?" he asked, shocked.

"You heard me, tie her wrists!" Harvy yelled. Gibbs looked to Ziva, who had a defiant look on her face. But she gave Gibbs a nod. She had not been expecting this to happen, but she knew the turmoil his mind must be in now. She had experienced it briefly when she thought that she was going to have to harm Gibbs. Now he must be facing the same thing, and she knew that she had to assure him. So she nodded, encouraging him not to disobey.

With a pained expression on his face, Gibbs took the rope and tied Ziva's hands together in front of her.

"Hang her on the hook," Harvy instructed. Gibbs took a deep breath, and lifted her up so that she was hanging off the hook on the wall that he had not noticed before. She was hanging so that her feet barely touched the floor, facing away from them, unable to see what was going on behind her.

"Now. I think the rest is self explanatory," Harvy chuckled, handing Gibbs a whip. He sucked in a breath, horrified.

"And if I don't?" he asked, afraid to know the answer.

"The punishment for her will be ten times worse, I can assure you of that," Harvy said, ominously. Gibbs was dying to look to Ziva's eyes, to read her, but she was facing the other way. He did not want to hurt her, it was the last thing he wanted, but he knew that Daniels was not bluffing. He _would _make Ziva suffer, far more than she would if Gibbs were to be the one hurting her... Making up his mind, he grasped the whip and turned to face Ziva.

He would never forgive himself for this.

…

Harvy left thirty minutes later, leaving Gibbs alone with a bloody and barely conscious woman. Just looking at her tore Gibbs apart, he knew he was responsible for her pain. As carefully as he could, he unhooked her and gently laid her down in the corner, backing away from her. He knew she would not want to see him now.

"Gibbs..." she said, sucking in a breath. She needed to tell him that she knew this was not his fault. When she had heard Harvy say "the rest is self-explanatory," she had honestly panicked a little. She did not know what was coming, and she did not like it. She could not see what Harvy was showing Gibbs, and not knowing always made her nervous. It was not until she felt the first blow hit her back that she realized what was going on.

She knew that Gibbs was in far more pain, mentally, than she was physically. Honestly, Harvy was a genius. If he kept this up, she knew that Gibbs _would_ crack. He thought of her as his daughter, and he had already lost one. Losing another would be painful beyond imagination, but to know that he was the one directly responsible for her death?

Harvy was right. That would break him.

Ziva couldn't have that happen. She knew, by the way he backed away when he placed her in the corner, he was blaming himself for this. He thought that _she_ blamed him for this, he thought that she hated him... she could not have that.

"Gibbs, this is not your fault," she assured him. She had felt far worse pain than this, anyway.

"Don't give me that bullshit, Ziva-"

"You can not blame yourself for this, Gibbs! He _wants _you to tear yourself up over this!"

"But it _is_ my fault..."

"No. Do not think like that."

"I hurt you, Ziver. You are like my own flesh and blood and I will never forgive myself for hurting you-" Gibbs did not understand why she was not mad at him. Her back was cut open, bleeding tremendously. The back of her pajama top was slashed open in many places. It had to hurt like hell, and yet she seemed to be calm.

"You have to. Do not play right into his hands. And do not think for a second that that was all he is going to make you do. There will be more to come."

"And you expect me to just _do what he says?_ Everything? He is psychotic, there is no telling what will happen..." Gibbs knew he was acting completely... non-Gibbsy, but he could not stand hurting her.

"You have no other choice, Gibbs."

"Yes I do. I can choose to disobey him."

"And make the pain greater for me? Do you not think that I _want _you to be the one to do it? Because I do, Gibbs. If I had to choose between you and him, I would choose _you_."

"Lemme get this straight. You want me to hurt you."

"No! I would rather it be you, someone I know I can trust."

"And your trust in me afterwards?" 

"I will not blame you." Gibbs sighed at her insistance. He knew that if it was the other way around he would want the same thing, but he didn't know if he would be able to bring himself to hurt her.

The beating had taken a lot out of them both. They found that they were unable to keep their eyes open, even though they could tell it was nearly midday by looking at the sun through the barred window. They could barely see it through the think concentration of trees. Somewhere in his mind, this registered as _forest_ but he was too tired to really care. They both drifted off into unconsciousness, with his arms wrapped around her protectively. Her presence was comforting, and allowed him a peaceful sleep despite their situation. The sleep was welcome, it took them to another place.

For any place was better than where they were now.

A/N: Please tell me what you thought! Chapters come faster when I have a little encouragement:)


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: Please note that this is the chapter I told you about at the beginning of the fic. You have been warned.

How long had they been held here? It seemed like weeks, although they could tell it was not nearly that long. Judging by the lack of light in the window, it seemed to be very late sunday night. That means they had been held captive for about a day.

And tomorrow (or was it even today?) was monday, which meant work. Which meant that someone, _someone,_ had to have noticed there was something hinky going on when neither Gibbs nor Ziva showed up to work. There would be search parties out in no time.

Which, of course, would do no good if they were out of the country. For all he knew they could be.

The door flew open, and Harvy strode in, confidence radiating from him with every step he took. Ziva gasped and her head flew up, off Gibbs' shoulder, startled out of her sleep.

"I'm ba-ack!" Harvy said in a sing-song voice, smugness evident in his smirk. This made both of them uneasy. He was excited, excited for what was to come.

Which surely meant a whole lot of pain for them.

"Are you kiddies ready for today? I can assure you, today will be the most fun of them _all..."_ It was official. This guy was utterly insane. That, or he was drunk. Probably both.

"Somehow I doubt that," Ziva scoffed. Gibbs smiled a little at her courage. He had already knew she was brave, but witnessing her literally _laughing_ in the face of danger was a whole nother story.

"Oh it will be. I think Gibbs has dreamed of this day ever since he met you," Harvy chuckled at the confused faces before him. "Don't worry. It will make sense soon, I can guarantee you that. Now, Mr. Gibbs, if you please, would you and Miss David stand up for me?" Knowing it was best to not disobey, he stood up, then offered Ziva his hand to help her us as well. He smiled a little as she refused and got to her feet on her own. Still the same old Ziva.

"Alright. Now..." Harvy reached into his pocket and pulled out four pieces of rope. "Put her on the table." Gibbs didn't like where this was going, but he still obeyed. He was going to help her onto the table, but again she refused his help and did it herself.

Ziva, unlike Gibbs, knew exactly what Harvy was going to force Gibbs into this time. It made her sick to her stomach, but she knew that to stay alive it was the only option.

"Now..." Harvy handed the rope to Gibbs. "Tie her limbs to the table legs." Gibbs squeezed his eyes shut, and took a deep breath. When he opened his eyes, he looked straight to Ziva. Her own eyes held determination and a steely resolve, but he could detect the horror and the embarrassment that she tried to shield from him. It was times like this that he wished he wasn't so good at reading people. But again he obeyed the orders, knowing it was the best for her. He was caught off guard when he was handed a knife.

"Cut off her clothes, and then you will rape her," Harvy ordered.

Gibbs froze.

No. No, no, NO! This could not be happening, not to him, not to Ziva. Ziva was like his own daughter, how could he be expected to violate her like that, in a way that only a monster could? He could barely breathe, this was just too much. What he was being asked to do, it was terrible, incomprehensible. Unfathomable. Completely and undeniably sick. There was no way he could do that to her, humiliate her like that.

He would be just as sick as Harvy, should he do what he was told. But he knew that he had no choice.

What hurt the most was the expression on Ziva's face. It did not change. She had been expecting this, ever since he was ordered to place her on the table. The look in her eyes, though. It was like the ghosts, the demons, of her past were circling her, consuming her.

"I can't," Gibbs said, trying to keep himself from panicking.

"You must. Unless you want _me _to do it. I will do it, then I will make you do it by force. Is that _really_ what you want for her? Plus, you can't deny that you_ want_ it. You have wanted it ever since you met her. You want this."

"No, I DON'T, YOU SICK _BASTARD!_" Gibbs yelled, eyes desperately trying not to stray back to the woman bound spread-eagle to the table.

"Well, you have two options. Choose wisely," Harvy adivsed.

"Gibbs, you have to do it," she spoke, her voice strained. Gibbs was shocked that she was able to remain so calm, though.

"I can't do that to you, Ziver."

"He will make you either way. I... I don't want it to be him," she whispered the last part, almost ashamed. She was practically _asking_ him to do it.

"Ziva, don't make me do this to you!"

"Gibbs, _please!_" Gibbs was startled that she had actually said _please._ She was near begging now. She _really_ did not want this creep anywhere near her. She would rather Gibbs be the one to violate her. She hated how that sounded, but she knew it was true. Harvy was a sick pervert, and not mentally stable. Gibbs was like a father to her, and she knew that it would be as terrible for him as it was for her, but she could not stand Harvy. Thinking about him touching her like that was repulsive.

It was selfish, really. This man's mission was to torture _Gibbs,_ not her. She should do whatever she could to help spare his sanity. But just thinking about Harvy made her skin crawl. She knew Gibbs would be gentle, he would try not to hurt her. This was so selfish, but she needed Gibbs to take that first option. She knew she would end up being violated by him either way, and at least the first option didn't involve Harvy coming anywhere near her.

Could you see someone's heart break? Ziva believed that was _exactly_ what she was seeing as Gibbs listened to her beg for him to take the first option. To do it himself, without a fight. To follow orders. He couldn't stand the thought, but she could tell that he would do it in the end, for her. He would do anything for her, anything she asked. Gibbs loved her, and if she asked him to do something he would.

Staring into those pleading eyes, Gibbs made up his mind. She was like a daughter to him, a blessed daughter. He would do what she wanted him to do, for her.

He needed to remember that this was all for _her._

He knew he would hate himself for this. He knew she would hate him for this, in the end. But he had made up his mind.

And so he took the knife, and carefully began to cut away at her clothing. He did his best not her cut her, but Harvy began to yell at him to go hurry up. Sighing, he began to cut them away more hastily.

Soon, she lay on the table in nothing but her undergarments.

"Remove it all," Harvy ordered. Gibbs took a deep breath and steeled himself against what he was about to do.

"Remove yours, too." Gibbs followed orders.

"Get on top of her." Gibbs followed orders.

"And begin." Gibbs hesitated.

But he followed orders.

He tried to ignore the stifled cry of pain. He looked to her eyes, to see what was there, but she had turned her head away from him.

She already hated him for this, he knew that much.

"Come on, faster!" Harvy ordered enthusiastically. His voice made Gibbs shutter, and he tried not to think about the pain she must be in. But Gibbs did as he was told.

A single tear fell down his face as she reached her breaking point, and a blood curling scream erupted from her throat. Gibbs reached his point at the same time, hating himself for it. This act was supposed to be a beautiful thing, a miracle. It was supposed to result in a big belly, and then a baby carriage.

Now he had ruined this for her. He just hoped that he hadn't gotten her pregnant. _That _would be unbearable.

Gibbs collapsed, breathing hard, tears still pouring down both of their faces. His head was right next to hers.

"I am so, so, sorry, Ziver," he uttered in her ear, his voice cracking. She was still shaking.

"Rule number 6, Gibbs," she whispered.

He was about to get off, when Harvy spoke again, his voice reprimanding.

"What makes you think you are done, Gibbs?" he scoffed.

"I beg your freaking _pardon?_" Gibbs asked.

"Keep going," Harvy said, motioning with his hands for him to continue.

"No. No." Gibbs' voice quavered.

"Yes, yes," Harvy countered. "Unless you want to take me up on my second offer..." The threat in his voice was undeniable. Gibbs took a deep breath, trying to calm himself. He had to do this. The alternative was worse.

And so he continued, tears pouring down his cheek.

A/N: yeah, intense. I cried when I wrote this. This is _not_ the type of thing I normally write. Don't worry it will all be over soon. Please review, I hope it wasn't too terrible.


	5. Chapter 5

Only when Ziva had fallen unconscious, did Harvy tell Gibbs he could stop.

"I believe that's good enough for today, yes?" he asked, maliciously, and turned on his heels and left, slamming the door behind him. Gibbs slid off of Ziva gently and pulled up his previously discarded pants.

Using all the care he could, he untied her limbs from the table and lifted her up, setting her down in the corner. He knew she would not want to be on the table, she would feel too exposed.

Grief and guilt was all he could feel. It overcame his brain and overwhelmed is soul. She was like a daughter to him. What did that make him now? It made him no better than the child abusers they arrested and threw in jail.

That whole time, all he could see was Kelly. She looked like Kelly to him, in his mind.

He softly swept her hair from her face and wiped the tears off her cheeks, then placed a gentle kiss on her forehead. He was almost glad she was unconscious. He knew that if she was awake, she would be completely aware of the pain she was in, and completely aware of who did this to her. She would be repulsed, and not want to be near him. He really wanted to hold her, so he was glad that, at least for now, she was blissfully unaware. Maybe she was suffering less.

Harvy's comment had scared him, rattled him to the bone. This last hour had been hell for both him and Ziva, he doubted he could live through it again.

Trying to ignore the shoots of stabbing pain that it sent through his heart, he looked her up and down. She was bloody and bruised. All his doing.

He couldn't stand looking at her naked body anymore. Since her regular clothes were discarded, he took off his USMC sweatshirt. It was difficult, but he was finally able to get it on her. It was far too large for her, and for that he was grateful. It covered her more.

Gibbs knew that when she woke, she would not want to be near him. So he took advantage of the fact that she wasn't awake and gently cradled her in his arms, rocking her back and forth, singing a lullaby. It had been Kelly's favorite.

"_Hush little baby, don't say a word, Papa's gonna buy you a mockingbird._

_And if that mockingbird won't sing, Papa's gonna buy you a diamond ring._

_And if that diamond ring turns brass, Papa's gonna buy you a looking glass."_

He sang until the sun began to rise, the first beams of light shining on the table through the window. She still had not woken, and he was beginning to worry that it was not a good sign.

Suddenly, there were gunshots, echoing through the building. One, then two, then three, eventually he lost count of them.

He hoped, no he _prayed_ that they were good gunshots. The one that means rescue, and relief, not the kind that means they had one very pissed off kidnapper on their hands.

He held her tighter to his body, protecting her from whatever may come. He looked up as he heard another gunshot, right outside the door to their cell, followed almost immediately by the clanking of metal.

The door flew open.

It was a woman who had kicked down the door, gun drawn. She wore a bulletproof vest bearing the word POLICE and a determined look in her eye. Gibbs sighed with relief.

"She needs medical attention," were the first words out of Gibbs' mouth. The officer nodded.

"I'm Officer Streb. I need you to remain calm, everything is going to be okay-" the officer began the usual assurances of safety, which Gibbs interrupted.

"I'm Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs, NCIS. This is Ziva David, also an NCIS agent," he explained. "This is not the first time we have been kidnapped." Officer Streb nodded.

"How long have you been here?"

"Not long. A day, maybe a little longer. You found us quick," he observed.

"We had a BOLO out on Harvy Daniels' van. It was seen in D.C. On saturday night. Our tech guys worked some computer magic and found this place. We didn't even know you were missing." 

"I doubt anyone's noticed yet," he said, standing up with the officer's help. He sat Ziva on the table. "I don't have regular contact with anybody outside of work, and considering today in Monday... Give them two hours before they start to even worry." At this point the paramedics were filing in.

"Where are we?" Gibbs asked as the EMTs lifted Ziva onto a stretcher.

"An old cabin out in Shenandoah National Park. No one ever comes back here, it's a brilliant place for a hideout really," Officer Streb answered. Gibbs held Ziva's hand as they were led out of the cell.

It was hard to believe it had only been a day. It seemed like they had spent a lifetime in this hellhole.

"And Daniels?" Gibbs asked.

"I am sorry to say Daniels got away. All four of his men are dead, however. And Daniels isn't very careful, it's only a matter of time before we catch him. Why did he get you two anyway?"

"I killed his brother in the line of duty. He blames me."

"And her?"

"Strategic planning," Gibbs answered ominously, giving the officer the vibe to not push.

When they got to the ambulance, the paramedics insisted that he was loaded onto a stretcher, too. _He_ insisted he was fine, and luckily got out of it. He didn't need to be checked out, he was fine. Ziva was unconscious and in a lot of pain, she needed the medical attention so much more than he did.

"Where are we taking them?" the driver asked. "Nearest?" 

"Bethesda Naval Hospital," Gibbs answered, even though the question was clearly not meant for him. The driver didn't ask questions, just drove them to the hospital. "What time is it?"

"5:30 A.M., sir, one of the paramedics not working on Ziva replied. There was not much they could do for her here, so they basically just needed to check her vitals.

Gibbs rode in silence the whole way to the hospital, trying to tune out the sirens. He needed to think.

Finally they arrived at Bethesda, and Ziva was unloaded into the Emergency Room. Gibbs wasn't allowed in, but he was told once the doctor finished the initial exam he could go and see her. He had already made up his mind that he would only go in if she was unconscious.

"Family of Ziva David?" A nurse called. Gibbs jumped up from his seat in the waiting room.

"Is she awake?" he asked, almost warily.

"No, sir. The doctor has a few questions for you," she informed him. Gibbs just nodded. "They've moved her to room 306," the nurse added.

When Gibbs arrived at room 306, he was met by a doctor.

"Hello, I'm Doctor Yehl," the man extended his arm, and Gibbs shook it.

"Special Agent Gibbs. Call me Gibbs."

"Miss David's injuries are mainly superficial. There is not much I can do for her but clean them to protect from infection. She does not have an infection, and none of the lacerations on her back were deep enough to need stitches. However, there are signs of sexual assault. I am going to need to preform a rape kit, with your permission. You are listed as her next-of-kin," the doctor informed him. Next-of-kin? She had listed him as her next-of-kin? Despite everything, he found himself smiling a little at that. But then he was reminded of the matter at hand.

"Preform the test," he nodded, "But don't collect any evidence," he added.

"No evidence? Don't you want the man who did this to her to be caught?"

"He is already caught."

"Alright. I am going to need you to step out." Gibbs nodded, and with one last look at Ziva, lying motionless on the bed, he backed out of the room, and the door shut in his face.

Not too long after, the doctor called him back in.

"There is a lot of bruising and tearing, Gibbs. Whoever did this was brutal, savage in his assault, but most of the injuries will heal on their own. This man deserves to be locked up, though, Gibbs," the doctor informed him.

"Yeah," Gibbs agreed, "Yeah, he does."

And with that, Gibbs sadly retreated from the room. For Ziva was beginning to stir.

He whipped out his phone to call DiNozzo. They had to be worried by now.

A/N: Sorry none of the team has been in this yet. They really never had a part in the beginning of this anyway. Also, if I got anything medically incorrect I apologize. Please review! Next chapter will be up soon because I truly love writing this story!


	6. Chapter 6

Ziva was awake, and Tony, Abby, McGee, and Ducky were with her. Gibbs had been right, they hadn't really noticed anyone was missing. Abby was horrified at the lacerations on Ziva's back, but for all she knew that was the extent of the injuries. Tony was worried, but as usual, he was covering it up with his clown mask. McGee was acting like a big brother, tending to all her needs. Ducky was telling stories and just being a comforting presence. Something that Gibbs knew that he himself would never be able to do again.

Gibbs was in the cafeteria drinking their crap coffee, trying to get his mind off her, lying broken in the bed. He wanted so bad to go and hug her, comfort her, but he knew he couldn't. He doubted he would ever be able to see her again, not after this.

He would hand in his resignation tomorrow. He didn't want Ziva to have to go to work everyday and face the monster that did this to her. No, they couldn't work together anymore. He wasn't going to make her leave, either. That would be selfish. He would resign, and go to Mexico where he could drown his sorrows in beer.

He would never come near her again.

…

"Where is Gibbs?" Ziva asked, trying to keep the worry out of her voice.

"I don't know. I haven't seen him since I got here," Tony responded.

"I saw him, he's down in the cafeteria," Tim replied.

"Is he going to come up and visit?" Ziva pried, attempting not to sound too sad. She really needed someone who knew what she had gone through to be with her now. As much as she loved her co-workers, they just didn't understand. She intended to keep it that way.

"He didn't say much about coming up, actually. When I asked him he avoided the question." Ziva sighed. She needed to talk to him, _really_ needed to talk to him. The best she could tell, she had passed out from the pain. That was her last conscious memory. They really needed to discuss what happened with him. He probably was in a world of self-loathing right now. She wanted to ask someone to get him, but she knew he would come when he was ready.

"So, metro handed over all the evidence in your case to me. They wanted me to look for anything that could aid them in finding Daniels," Abby changed the subject, seeing that it was upsetting Ziva. "They want it to be a joint investigation." Ziva just prayed that the evidence Abby was going to be examining was nothing that could potentially... embarrass herself or Gibbs. Ziva nodded.

"That is good. I know you all just got here, but I really need some sleep. Do you think you could just leave me alone for a while?" Ziva tried to keep any impatience out of her voice.

"Sure thing," McGee agreed, and ushered Abby out of the room. Ducky gave her a gentle smile and left the room. Tony squeezed her hand.

"Sleep tight," he murmured, and left.

Ziva was exhausted, and if you factored in the painkillers currently running through her system, you have a recipe for a deep sleep.

And so that's what she did. She slept, wishing that when she opened her eyes in the morning, this would all just be some horrid dream.

…

"Hello, Jethro," Ducky greeted Gibbs as he entered the cafeteria.

"Hey, Duck." Gibbs didn't look up.

"I'm going to cut to the chase, Jethro. You need to go visit Ziva."

"And why is that?"

"Because, she is sad you aren't there! She tries to hide it, but she is disappointed that you weren't there with her when she woke up!" 

"You must have misread her or something."

"What is going on, Jethro? Why are you avoiding Ziva?"

"I'm not avoiding her. I just need some time to... think."

"Well, you can think after you talk to her. You went through the same thing she did, you were there when it happened. She's going to want your company," Ducky explained.

"Somehow I doubt that, Duck."

"Jethro, I don't know what's going on, but I know one thing. When I look at her, I see a girl in need of comfort from her father. Now, I don't know what you see, or what you think you will see, but I know that she needs you, especially now. You were always there before. Why are you abandoning her when she is hurting, in pain.

_Because, Duck. I am the reason for her pain._ Gibbs thought. He sighed, and threw his coffee in the trash.

"What is she doing now?" he asked.

"She said she wanted sleep. She told us she was tired," Ducky answered, happy that he had succeeded. Gibbs just nodded and left the cafeteria, heading towards the elevator.

…

When she finally began to regain her senses, she felt a warm weight on her hand. Opening her eyes, she was able to see Gibbs holding vigil at her bedside, holding her hand. She was surprised.

"Gibbs!" she exclaimed. She had thought she would have to wait longer to talk to him. Gibbs swiveled his head around to face her, strartled.

"You're awake! I'm going to go now," he said quickly, pulling his hand away and standing up, about to bolt out of the room.

"Wait! Do not leave, we need to talk," she insisted.

"I will resign, I'm getting old as it is. No one ever has to know about this, and I promise you will never see me again," he tried to leave again, but Ziva still needed to talk to him.

"Gibbs! You do not need to resign."

"You know what I did."

"Please, Gibbs."

"How can you even be in the same room as me?" he asked. She should be repulsed.

"Gibbs. Get your head on straight. I do not blame you!"

"_I_ sure as hell do!" he exclaimed. She sighed.

"The doctor said I can go home tomorrow. I do not want to be alone, though."

"I will see if DiNozzo can take care of you."

"Gibbs..."

"Abby, then?"

"Gibbs, can I stay with you?" she asked, realizing he was not taking the hint.

"Ziva, you know I love you, but I don't know if that is the best thing for you..." he sighed. He just did not understand her.

"I want to stay with you, Gibbs! I know what is the best for me!"

"You can stay with me, you know that. My door is always open to you." _I just don't get why you want to be with me, after everything I did._

"Thank you," she said gratefully. He just nodded and left the room.

"Gibbs! We still need to talk!" she shouted after him.

"Tonight!" he called back.

She smiled, happy that he had agreed. She needed to get it through his thick skull that this was not his fault.

She still loved him.

A/N: Yeah... short I know. But I think its a good stopping point... Please review! You are all awesome! Thanks for reading! So until next time...

Alli


	7. Chapter 7

The next evening, the doctor signed her release forms. She was so relieved to finally be out of here, for her the word hospital carried a negative connotation. She had been to many hospitals in her life, and it was safe to say that many visits had not been on the happiest of occasions.

No one questioned it when she declared she was going home with Gibbs. Everybody offered to let her stay with them, and she knew she would be comfortable in any of their homes, but she really needs Gibbs right now. Just Gibbs.

She fought the nurses when they insisted she leave in a wheelchair. Gibbs gave the head nurse one of his Gibbs-glares, however, and she instantly agreed that they could waive the hospital policy for her.

Gibbs helped her into his car, much to her exasperation. She didn't like feeling weak, and he knew it. But she didn't know that he was simply trying to do everything he could to help her, even though he knows nothing he says or does can make up for what he did to her.

She didn't say anything the whole ride, neither of them did. She laid her head down, and shut her eyes. Despite sleeping almost all of the past two days, she was still exhausted. Gibbs was too, their ordeal had messed them up in a lot of ways. She doubted they would ever be the same again.

…

"Abby, I have evidence here for you," Tony called over the music. Abby swiveled in her chair. It was pretty late to still be at work, but they were all working double-time to catch Daniels. Abby sucked down the last bit of her Caf-Pow!, threw it in the trash, and walked over to the table that Tony and McGee, who had followed in behind him, had set the evidence boxes on. The first thing she pulled out was a surveillance camera.

"Where was this found?" she asked as she took out the memory chip and inserted it into her computer. Tony and McGee walked to the big screen past her desk.

"I'm not sure, but I think we will find out soon," he pointed out as the recordings began to load. A picture appeared on the screen a few seconds later.

"It looks like the room that Gibbs and Ziva were held in," she mused. The camera was angled directly downward, and they were able to see Gibbs and Ziva huddled in the corner. "It must have been positioned on the ceiling. Probably out of their view, otherwise they would have disabled it in a heartbeat."

"Play it," Tony directed. She pressed the play button. Nothing changed, Ziva and Gibbs were still in the corner. Abby began to fast forward, until she noticed the door open.

"Is there audio?" McGee asked.

"Erm..." Abby checked, "No." They all watched as Harvy began to talk to them, but soon left. They fast-forwarded a little more, until Harvy came back in. They watched as Gibbs tied Ziva's hands and hung her on the hook.

They watched as Harvy handed the whip to Gibbs. They all gasped when they saw Ziva's skin split open under the whip. Abby buried her head in Tim's shirt.

"Oh my god... he made Gibbs do it. It wasn't Harvy that hurt her..." she cried. Tony and McGee were too stunned to move. They all knew that Gibbs would never had hurt her if he had a choice.

The man left again, and Abby went back to her computer, wiped off her eyes, and fast-forwarded a little more. It was a while before the door opened again.

"Please," Abby spoke to no one else in particular. She knew that wishful thinking wouldn't change what happened, but she didn't think she could watch what had happened last time again.

But this was worse.

They watched as Gibbs tied Ziva to the table. They watched as he cut off her clothes.

They watched as he raped her.

Abby's head was in Tim's shirt again, and she was sobbing. She couldn't watch this, thank god there was no audio. But Tony and Tim watched, even though they felt they were invading Gibbs and Ziva's privacy. They had a job to do, and that required watching this tape. Tony averted his eyes when he saw Ziva's mouth open in what was obviously a scream. Even though there was no sound, he could hear it in his head, echoing.

"I-is it o-over?" Abby sobbed.

"I... I think so..." Tony said. Abby lifted her head, and automatically regretted it. "Abby, cover your eyes," Tony firmly directed. He had been mistaken. It was not over.

Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, Harvy left the room. Abby wiped the tears from her eyes as she watched her father-figure gingerly untie and lift her best friend, her sister of sorts. She saw him take off his sweatshirt and carefully put it on the unconscious woman, trying to conserve whatever modesty she had left.

"Oh my god..." she cried, her voice breaking.

And she completely broke down in McGee's arms, while Tony stood in complete shock and horror, unable to rip his eyes off the man on the screen, holding his broken partner and singing to her softly.

…

Gibbs pulled up to his house, and looked over to see Ziva sleeping in the passenger seat. She was completely knocked out, the painkillers in her system helping keep her that way. He got out and gently picked her up, minding the wounds on her back. He still flinched every time he thought of how she got them.

He knew she wanted to talk to him, but he hadn't the heart to wake her from her slumber. She just looked so peaceful in her sleep. He figured they could talk in the morning, for they had both been given a few days off work.

She shifted a little when he laid her in his bed. His guest room was still full of boxes and being used as a storage area, so this would have to do for now. He figured he could give up sleeping on the bed tonight. It was the least he could do for her. He would take the couch.

…

_I am being restrained, I can not see a thing. My eyes just simply won't open. I can hear fighting, two men fighting. They are saying things, things that I would rather not think about. One wants me... one is trying to protect me. I pray that the protector wins, for my own sake. This had happened before, the voice of the man arguing with my protector is strangely familiar, yet I can not make out the owners of the voices, only they are angry. I hear a bang._

"_Good bye, Special Agent Gibbs." she hears someone say. The other man. The one that wants to hurt me._

_I still can not see. All I know is that I can tell who it is who was the protector, and I know who it is who is trying to hurt me. I know Gibbs is dead, I can feel it. I feel someone on top of me, I don't want to feel anything anymore. There is only pain, just pain... _

_And heartbreak._

…

He wakes up with a start, hearing his name being called. Her voice is urgent, so he sprints up the stairs, thinking she could be in trouble.

Upon arriving at the room, he is terrified of what he is seeing, but most of all what he is hearing.

She is screaming. Screaming his name.

"_Gibbs!_ Please, no, please don't... Please Gibbs!" she screams. She is terrified, and is thrashing about on the bed.

He is hurting her. He is hurting her in her dream. He knows she blames him. This has hall been a lie, otherwise she would not be thinking he would hurt her in her subconscious thoughts! He is hurting her in her dream, and he can do nothing about it but wake her up and promise her he will never touch her, never hurt her, again.

He won't even look at her if that was what it takes.

Gibbs runs to her bedside, and whispers her name, hoping not to startle her. He begins to raise his voice, but all she does is scream and struggle more. Tears are pouring down her face. 

He really wished it wouldn't have to come to this. Taking a deep breath, he grabbed her shoulders and shook her awake.

…

_I just want to die, God let me die. It's not like he hasn't done this before, this is not the first time. But the pain of loss and defeat is far worse than the physical pain. If Gibbs could not stop this monster, who could?_

_I hear a man whispering my name. I can tell it is Gibbs. He is telling me to open my eyes... No, I refuse. Besides, I can not. But even if I could, I would not give this bastard the satisfaction of looking me in the eyes, seeing the pain, the humiliation, there. Gibbs' voice is like a spirit. I wonder if he is going to haunt me. After all, it is my fault he is dead. I would actually deserve to be haunted for the rest of my life, but at this point I do not know how long that will be. I hope it will not be long before I am dead._

_And now Gibbs' voice is louder, getting impatient. Saying my name, telling me to open my eyes. Why was he doing this? I thought he was on my side, or at least he used to be. Was I mistaken? Was it really that... monster that had been shot? Had he been shot by Gibbs? That would be nice... except then who was doing this to me?_

_I finally find the strength to open up my eyes, and when I do, I scream._

_Gibbs is looking at me. He is holding my shoulders firmly._

_It is him._

A/N: I got a good amount of reviews last time! Keep it up, you guys rock! Tell me what you thought, and who you think the "monster" she thought was fighting with Gibbs was! I already know, I just wanna see what you think:)

Alli


	8. Chapter 8

He shook her as gently as he could, and when he did, her eyes began to flutter. Once they were fully open, she screamed. He knew she was conscious, she knew exactly who he was, and she was terrified.

He wanted so bad to just run, save her this pain. But he couldn't leave without making sure she knew that he would never, ever do those things to her willingly.

So, against his better judgement, he held her tightly, and comfortingly, until she stopped her futile struggling and seemed to register the reality in front of her.

"Gibbs," she breathed, as he hugged her to his chest.

"I'm so sorry," he whispered.

"For what?" she asked, pulling away to look at him in the eyes. It wasn't like him to break rule 6.

"Everything," he replied. The tone of his voice nearly broke Ziva's heart in half.

"Do not be sorry. It was not your fault. I do not blame you-"

"Like hell you don't," he practically growled. He was getting pissed that she didn't just start screaming at him. She should be punching him, kicking him, yelling at him and telling him what a sick, horried man he was. He wanted her to. He deserved it. He would just sit there and take it, because he deserved every last bit of her anger.

"Wha-"

"Don't think I don't know what your dream was about, Ziver. It was easy to guess," he sighed.

"Then why do you think I blame you? You were only trying to help..." Gibbs started at her, confused.

"What?"

"In the dream. You were trying to stop it... Oh god, Gibbs. You... you think... You were not the one hurting me, Gibbs."

"Bullshit! You were screaming at me to stop!" he argued.

"Not at you," she shook her head.

"It was my _name!"_

"No... I was screaming at _him_ to stop. I was screaming at you because you... because he killed you," she cried, and buried her head into his chest, assuring herself that he was still there, not going away.

"You... thought I was dead? You were... scared for me?" Gibbs asked, brow furrowed. This couldn't be right. She should be _rejoicing_ at the thought of him being dead.

"Of course!" she said, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"Then... then who was hurting you?" he asked. She turned her head away and stayed silent.

"Ziver? I know I am not the ideal person to be talking to about this but..." he tried to get her attention.

"I... I do not want to talk about it."

"Not with me?"

"Not with anyone."

"But especially not with me?" he asked. She looked at him.

"What is it with you, Gibbs! You are acting like you _want_ me to be mad at you! Do you _want _me to be angry with you? Why would you want that?" she was beyond confused at what was running through him mind right now.

"Because you _should be!_ You should hate me! You should be having me arrested, or yelling at me for hurting you, for being so... selfish!" Gibbs was beginning to get frustrated.

"I hardly call what you did selfish, Gibbs. I saw your eyes while it was happening. This is _killing you_. This possibly hurt you more than it hurt me!" she contradicted.

"Ziver... I am supposed to be your father. I can't imagine doing that to Kelly, and doing it to you... I can't believe you still trust me!"

"Of course I trust you! You had no choice. I get that. I do not blame you." 

"I know you do," he said.

"Gibbs, can you please just listen to me for a second?"

"Alright."

"I admit I was scared while it was happening. I was terrified. I was terrified that when I look at you all I would see was him. That in my eyes, you would become just as terrible a father as he was... but Gibbs. You... you were so gentle. You apologized. You have no idea what a simple apology means to me. Your remorse alone speaks for itself. You would never hurt me intentionally, and I know that. I do not blame you, I do not hate you, I do no want you out of my life. I am embarrassed, of course, but I still love you. You will always be the father to me that _he_ wasn't. Alright? Please, just stop blaming yourself. It is why Daniels had you do it, and dare I say he is succeeding," she told him, grasping his hand. He smiled a little.

"I... I don't want to lose you. You and Abby are my little angels now. I can't lose you two. But Ziver... did... Did Eli..." he was afraid of the answer. Ziva looked away.

"I do not wish to speak of it." 

"If he did, I can only imagine how you must have seen me... just like him... was he the man in your dream?" Gibbs asked.

"Yes."

"Yes, he raped you, or yes he was the man in your dream."

"Yes... to both of those," she replied. Gibbs sucked in a breath, and hugged her to his chest.

"I'm so sorry," he whispered.

"It is the past, Gibbs. And the past... is the past," she told him.

"You... should probably be getting to sleep now. I'll leave you-" he began.

"No! No. I mean... Please, do not leave me alone. I will have nightmares again... Your presence is comforting, to say the least." 

"It will probably just give you more nightmares-"

"It will not, Gibbs. Please?" she practically begged. Gibbs just sighed, and laid back down beside her, wrapping his arms around her protectively.

"Goodnight," he whispered, and kissed her forehead.

She fell asleep smiling.

A/N: If this seems OOC, it's because we have no idea how either of them would react under this situation. Please review! My sis needs the comp, no time to edit, sorry. If it's bad, I will repost. Sorry for length!

Review!


	9. Chapter 9

Ziva woke up to an empty bed, and sun streaming through the windows and onto her face. She sat up quickly, and regretted it instantly when a sharp pain ripped through her back. She fell back into the bed with a small cry. She shut her eyes, waiting for the pain to pass. Once it did, she slowly, carefully, eased her aching body out of bed. Gritting her teeth against the pain in between her legs as she walked, she ventured downstairs to find Gibbs.

"Sleep well?" Gibbs asked, when he noticed her descending the stairs. He grabbed two mugs and began to brew some coffee.

"Yes. I told you that you being there would help," she pointed out. He rolled his eyes.

"How're you feeling?" he asked, concerned. He saw the way she walked. It wasn't normal, it was pained.

"I am fine," she lied, with a bit off annoyance.

"_No,_ you're not," he told her.

"You do not know how I feel, Gibbs," she promised him.

"You're right. I don't know how you feel, because I'm not you. But no one comes out of what... what happened and is just miraculously "fine" the next day, Ziver," he pointed out, dragging her to the couch.

"Fine, alright? It hurts. A lot," she sighed, exasperated. She had just admitted weakness. And weakness was bad. Gibbs' eyes instantly filled with guilt. "See? That is why I did not tell you."

"What's why?" he asked, confused. He handed her her coffee and guided her to the couch.

"You instantly felt guilty when I admitted to being in pain. You still blame yourself," she looked away.

"Damn right, I do. Because if it wasn't for me, you wouldn't _be_ in pain!" he cried. Why couldn't she just yell at him? Tell him he was a terrible person? It was nothing less than he deserved.

"You need to stop blaming yourself. This. Is. Not. Your. Fault," she said, punctuating each word.

"I don't get you, Ziver. You should hate me. I _raped you_. You are like a daughter to me, how could I ever forgive myself for_ violating _ you? I am... I am no better than Eli!" Ziva shut her eyes. Hearing the word said out loud, his straight-up admittance of his actions, hurt. It hurt even more when she realized something else.

"You know I forgive you, don't you?" she asked softly. He looked up.

"What?"

"You know that I forgive you for what you did. You just... You do not forgive yourself," she told him.

"I don't deserve forgiveness from you. But somehow, you _have_ forgiven me. I... Even if you forgive me, I don't think I will ever forgive myself. Not for as long as I live."

"Gibbs." Hearing him sound so broken nearly snapped her heart in two, "Let us get something straight. What you did in that warehouse, you did because you had no choice. I understand how you can feel like this is your fault-"

"_Can_ feel?" Gibbs interrupted, "You don't know what I feel!"

"Well then _tell me_! Let it all out!"

"I feel broken! I feel so incredibly guilty it's inexplicable. I am just like Eli, I have betrayed your trust. I don't see how you could ever look at me again. I'm a monster, I deserve to go to hell," he burst out. Ziva nodded, taking in all that she could from what he said.

"Gibbs, what was Daniels' mission?" she asked, even though she knew the answer.

"You already-"

"Just tell me."

"He wanted to break me."

"Exactly. And do you _want_ him to succeed? Do you want him to have fulfilled his mission?"

"Of course not!" 

"Then why are you letting him? You are playing right into his hands, Gibbs. Stop this guilt, right now. If you continue with it, you will continue to fall apart. Do not give Daniels the pleasure of knowing he has succeeded. When we catch that sick man, you want to be able to look him in the eyes and say _I won,_" she told him, taking his hand.

"This isn't about me, it's about you," he insisted.

"That is donkey crap, and you know it!" Gibbs smirked at her mistake. "It has not been about me, has never been _about me_,not this time. I was captured to play a role in breaking you. I unwillingly took part in that. But I was kidnapped to help break you. It was for you. The main reason he had you... violate me like that was to get to you, to mess with your head. If you keep up like this, he might have succeeded. You do not want that. I do not want that," she insisted.

"You really don't hold this against me?" 

"Of course not. Never in a million years. You are not like Eli. Eli did it willingly, because he is a disgusting man and a terrible father. You did it because at the time, it was the right thing to do." Gibbs looked at her, and he saw nothing in her eyes to indicate she was lying. She was being completely open with him. He sighed.

"I'll... try... to forgive myself," he told her. She smiled.

"Promise?" 

"Promise," he said, and kissed her forehead.

"Thank you."

…

Abby arrived at Tony's house around 0700, jittery and nervous.

"What if he hates us?" she asked, when he got in the car with her and McGee.

"Why would he hate us, Abs?" Tony asked as she started the car.

"I don't think either of them would want us to know."

"They need to know that we know," Tim told her, "We aren't going to make a big deal out of it. We will just act as though we are only there to drop off a home-cooked meal for the both of them before heading to work to go catch this psycho. And then, at the opportune moment, we will subtly let them know we know," he relayed the plan back to him.

"Fine," Abby gave in. "I still have a bad feeling about this," she said. She had cried herself to sleep that night. She couldn't imagine what would have happened if it had been her instead of Ziva. It terrified her. The thought of Gibbs... no. She needed to stop this. Ziva is strong.

They pulled up in Gibbs' driveway a few minutes later. They all got out of Abby's car, and went up to his door. With a few last looks at each other, they opened the door.

"Hello? Gibbs? Ziva?" Abby called.

"In here!" they heard Gibbs say. They turned to the left, noticing the two of them sitting on the couch. They all went over to them. Abby sat the dish of lasagna on the kitchen counter.

"We brought you some dinner," Tony said, sitting down with them.

"How are you feeling this morning, Ziva?" McGee asked. Ziva smiled. McGee was always such a gentleman.

"I am feeling... alright, thank you for asking," she replied, nodding to him. Suddenly, Abby rushed forward and threw herself into Gibbs' arms, sobbing. Tim and Tony looked at each other. They should have known Abby wouldn't have been able to hold up for long.

"Abs...? I'm fine, it's Ziva you should be worried about," Gibbs assured her. Ziva shot Gibbs a death glare.

"I... d-don't wanna h-hurt her!" she cried, her face still buried in Gibbs' shirt.

"Thank you for the consideration, Abby," Ziva smiled. "But really, I am f-"

"_Don't _say you're fine, Ziva! We... there was a video camera. We... we know what happened in that cell," Tony admitted. Ziva and Gibbs froze, unable to say anything.

A/N: Please review! Sorry this one took so long to put up, I sort of lost my muse for a little while.


	10. Chapter 10

A/N: Everything that's going on in Gibbs head in the beginning of this chapter is just that: Gibbs' thoughts and worries. It's what he thinks they are thinking, not necessarily what they are really thinking. I think that makes sense! Tell me what _you_ think! This chapter is up so soon because I felt bad about the long wait last time. So here we are!

That was the final straw. How did they _not see a video camera?_ It was bad enough when Ziva had seen him like that but his entire team? And Abby, no less? How could they even look at him, after seeing that video?

Before, Gibbs had hope that maybe they could keep this a secret. It could be just between the two of them. And now? Now that hope was gone. This video tape was evidence. Evidence must be shown in court. If, no _when,_ they caught Daniels, they were both going to be needed as witnesses to testify. They were going to have to give a statement as well... this was a nightmare. How could he ever had let himself hope that no one need find out? There was too much evidence pointing to it, not to mention Ziva's medical records. This would be all over the news. And the jury would want to see these videos...

Gibbs didn't think he could live with the stares. It was a miracle that Ziva had found it in her heart to forgive him, but now there was the matter of everybody else. Ziva knew why he did it, she understood. But Abby and Tony and McGee didn't. How could they work under someone like him, knowing what he did?

Especially Tony, oh god how was Tony going to ever forgive him for _raping_ his partner! The woman Gibbs knew he loved! Tony looked up to him, like a father. A father that his own never was. Now, he was no doubt the same thing in his mind. A traitor, a bastard. How would _Tony_ forgive him for what he did to her? He probably was completely disgusted with him, for hurting Ziva like that. Tony doesn't have the whole story, he probably didn't hear what Daniels told Gibbs to do. Even _with_ the whole story, Tony could never forgive him for this.

What about McGee? Gibbs was Tim's role model. He looked up to him as well, also looked to him as a father figure of sorts. McGee had grown up with a loving family, and doting parents. He had seen the victims, he had seen the perps, but he couldn't imagine what could possess a father to do such horrible things to his daughter. Now, Tim must see Gibbs as one of those perps, and Ziva as a victim. McGee would no doubt question Gibbs' judgement, and question his own as well. Because now, everything that McGee once knew about Gibbs was being brought into question.

And then there was Abby. His little girl, his other daughter. Ziva was more of the... foster child, but Abby was like his own flesh and blood. She was his little girl. How would she react to seeing her father violate her sister like that? She would hate him. She loved Ziva. She had loved Gibbs for longer, he had been in her life longer. She looked up to him, and she trusted him. But now, she was no doubt wondering _who_ she could trust anymore. What if she imagined herself in Ziva's place? Oh god, that would be horrible. Ziva was one thing. Ziva had been through this kind of thing before, and she was trained. But Abby _wasn't._ What if Daniels had picked Abby to kidnap, instead of Ziva? Gibbs shuddered at the thought.

Ziva, on the other hand, was shocked. _A camera? How did we not see a camera?_ She was so furious. It was one thing for Gibbs to see her vulnerable, and weak. It was one thing for Gibbs to witness her humiliation. But it was another thing entirely to learn that your entire team has it on playback, and they have watched it. They would never see her the same again. She would be looked at like a victim, for the rest of her life. She doesn't want their pity. Pity gets her no where.

She covers her face with her hands, trying to shut it all out. This couldn't be happening. Why couldn't it have just been over once they were rescued? Why does the torture have to continue?

"How many people saw it?" she asked in a painted voice, once she was calmed down enough to form a rational question.

"Just... just us. No one else knows, and they don't have to," Tim assured her.

"No. You are wrong. What about court? What about convicting Daniels? I have to give a statement... Oh god, I didn't think about this before..." she was now becoming panicked. How had she overlooked the court issue? They were going to have to testify, and give a statement...

"We don't have to show the videotape in court," Tony pointed out.

"Daniels... he's a sick SOB. He doesn't necessarily have to _live_ to see his court day, if you catch my drift," Tim smiled evilly, elaborating on Tony's statement. Ziva looked up from her hands and smiled a little. She had never seen Tim like this. He wasn't pitying her... he looked downright outraged at Daniels.

"You would do that?" Ziva asked.

"Anything for family. There doesn't even _need _to be a trial. We can say he withstood arrest," Tony promised, the look on his face showing his eagerness to kill the man who did this to his father figure and his partner. Abby stopped crying and sniffled, looking up.

"I can hide all the evidence that points to the contrary," she offered. Ziva took her hand and squeezed it.

"Thank you. All of you," she said. She had been afraid of their pity, but there was no pity in their eyes. Only vengeance.

Suddenly, Gibbs stood up and strode out of the room. He needed some space. He had half expected Tony to have taken a swing at him by now, and the fact that he hadn't only made him puzzled. He went downstairs, poured himself some bourbon, and sat inside his boat. He needed to think.

He didn't get much time to himself, however. He looked up when he heard the steps creaking, and saw Tony descending them. Gibbs looked away.

"Someone needed to come check on you..." Tony explained his presence. "We drew straws," he admitted. "What made you run off like that?" he asked.

"Needed time to think," Gibbs replied, slowly rotating his mason jar in his hands, and staring at it like it was the most compelling thing in the world.

"What about?" Tony pressed.

"What do ya think, DiNozzo?" Gibbs asked rhetorically, getting annoyed.

"Sorry, stupid question," Tony sighed. He waited for Gibbs to reply, and when he didn't, Tony spoke up once again. "What? No reprimand on rule 6?" Tony teased.

"It would be hypocritical."

"And why is that?"

"I've broken that rule many times in the last few days, Tony," Gibbs sighed.

"Oh," Tony replied. He really didn't know what to say.

"I'm sorry, Tony," Gibbs said. Tony stared at him in disbelief.

"Sorry? Why?" 

"I know how you feel about Ziva. Neither of you will admit it, but you care for her on more than a partner level. What I've done..." It wasn't like Gibbs to wallow in self-pity. It was making Tony worried.

"Hey. Stop this. I love Ziva, but I don't resent you for what you did. I know you, Gibbs. I trust you. I know you would never _willingly_ hurt Ziva. You must have had a damn good reason," Tony told him. Gibbs looked up from his bourbon, a confused look on his face.

"You don't hate me?" he asked.

"Of course not. You aren't a monster, Gibbs. I trust you with my life, still. I'm sure Ziva does, too."

"And Abby and McGee?"

"They don't hold it against you either, Gibbs. Abby is only worried about the well-beings of both of you. She loves you, and you know it. You will always be Gibbs to her, no matter what. She's just worried about your... state of mind."

"And Tim?"

"Don't underestimate him. He will stand by you no matter what. He trusts you completely, as well. This doesn't change how we look at you. You are still our fearless leader who is not afraid to kick our asses once in a while." Gibbs just sat there, absorbing this. He heard no hint of deception in Tony's voice.

They trusted him. Even after everything, they trusted him. It was a miracle.

A/N: Thank you to everybody who reviewed last time! You guys are awesome! Please review this time, as well!


	11. Chapter 11

Abby, Tim, and Tony left an hour later. Once they were finally out the door, Ziva collapsed on the couch.

"You okay?" Gibbs asked. Ziva sighed.

"I can not believe they know," she said. Gibbs came to sit next to her.

"Hey, it's okay. They don't-"

"No, Gibbs! You do not get it!"

"Then explain," he prompted.

"You do not know how... humiliating it was, for me. I am the strong one, I am not supposed to show weakness... That video tape, Gibbs. That is me showing weakness. That is _proof_ of my weakness. And they all saw it! They all saw me in a place I never wanted any of them to see me in-" she was shaking her head.

"Ziva," Gibbs interrupted, "They don't think less of you," he said, soothingly.

"It was... bad enough that you witnessed my pain. That you saw me like that. But for the _whole team_ to have seen it..." she was becoming stressed, he could tell. Her eyes glistened with unshed tears. 

"Hey, it's okay. It's okay," he soothed, pulling her into his arms.

"I am fine," she tried to insist, struggling against his arms. She didn't want him to witness her impending breakdown. But he just _wouldn't give up._

And she couldn't stand it anymore. The tears began to fall, and her cries soon turned into sobs. They wracked her frame and tore out through her mouth. She couldn't stop them.

Gibbs tried to do what he had told her to. He tried to not feel guilty as she sobbed in his arms. But it was just so damn _hard_ to not blame himself for her pain.

He held her, stroking the back of her head and rocking her back and forth, singing to her softly.

"Hush little baby, don't say a word, Papa's gonna buy you a mockingbird. And if that mockingbird don't sing, Papa's gonna buy you a diamond ring. And if that diamond ring turns brass, Papa's gonna buy you a looking glass..." He continued to sing to her soothingly, like he had in that horrid cell.

After what seemed like years, her sobs became less violent, and her cries quieted. Exhausted, she collapsed in his arms.

"Thank you," she whispered.

"Anytime, Ziver," he promised.

Their moment was interrupted by the shrill cry of Gibbs' cell phone.

"Gibbs," he answered it.

"_Boss... I have some news,_" Tony said.

"Well?"

"_Director David is paying a visit to Washington_," Tony sighed. Gibbs cursed.

"That son of a bitch..."

"_Someone has to tell Ziva," _Tony said. Gibbs sighed.

"I will. When is he coming?"

"_Tomorrow. According to Vance, this has been planned for a while. I just found out about it now. Apparently there is something he has to discuss with Vance that is so delicate that even the most secure line in the world isn't trustworthy._"

"I'll tell her," Gibbs said, and hung of the phone with an exasperated huff.

"Tell me what, Gibbs?" Ziva asked, concerned.

"Your father is coming to D.C. Tomorrow," Gibbs replied, giving her a sympathetic look.

"Eli is coming?" her eyes widened. Gibbs nodded.

"No... no, tell me you are kidding!" How could this be? This was too much of a coincidence. She dreams about him and then the next day she finds out he's coming? It was almost as if it was planned!

"I wish I was, Ziver."

"_Harah!_" she cursed in hebrew.

"Ziver... what did he do to you?"

"He... I do not wish to talk about it."

"You need to get this out of your system," he told her.

"I... From the time I could walk, I was trained to be his personal assassin. The training was... brutal. He did a lot of it himself. One night, when I was six years old, he came into my room. He told me to... he told me to undress. I... I didn't know what was going on. When I asked, he said it was to teach me how to handle... how to handle pain. He told me it was how he would train me to not feel. I did not know what he was doing, all I knew was it hurt. Oh god, Gibbs, it hurt like hell. I was so small... and he was so large... it was a few months before I could take it without... without screaming. But, I was naïve. I believed him when he told me it was for my own good. I believed him when he told me it was what loving fathers did to their daughters. I know now that isn't true," she whispered, tears forming in her eyes once again.

Gibbs was fuming. He was trying not to show it outwardly, she needed someone to lean on. But it was so hard. Eli was such a bastard, how the hell could he do that to his own daughter? He had no idea what he was missing.

"I won't let him near you, I promise," Gibbs assured her softly, gently kissing her forehead. Ziva smiled a little.

Gibbs was so different from Eli. Eli cared only for himself and his career. Gibbs was sweet, and caring. He cared about her, about her wellbeing. He was gentle, and protective of her. She had no doubt that Gibbs would kick Eli's ass the second he set foot in D.C. After finding out what Eli did to Ziva, Gibbs wasn't sure he could be within a five mile radius of him without shooting him.

"Thank you," she nodded.

"Is it difficult to kill the Director of Mossad?" Gibbs mused. Ziva laughed, and for a moment, she forgot about all her troubles.

A/N: I have a request. If u have ever read a story like this one, could you tell me what the name is? I'm curious as to what other's have written. Please review!


	12. Chapter 12

It was the next day that Abby made the announcement. She had stayed up all night working non-stop. She had a newfound drive to catch this bastard. And she had.

She found Daniels.

It wasn't hard. He doesn't cover up his tracks very well. He had rented an apartment in Fairfax.

Gibbs tried to convince them to let him come, but Tony and Tim wouldn't budge. They were going on their own, and that was final.

Everyone knew this wasn't going to be the usual arrest of a perpetrator. This was more of a hit. Tony and McGee had agreed, however, to put a little camera on their hat and stream live video to Gibbs and Ziva. Both really wanted to see that bastard die.

When Gibbs had told Ziva, she practically jumped for joy, and when Gibbs told Ziva they got to _watch_ it all go down, a celebration ensued. She wanted this bastard who had torn apart her and Gibbs' lives to meet his end.

She had wanted to perform the "arrest" herself. She _had _informed them about her ex-assassin status, but they in turn reminded her that she can't walk. It was true. Walking without pain would take a few weeks. She _could, _however, manage to make it to the NCIS headquarters to watch the "arrest" go down in MTAC. Vance had agreed to look the other way on this one, once he saw the video. Yes, he had seen that horrid tape. He had felt it was his responsibility, as the Director and Gibbs' and Ziva's superior, to know what they had gone through. He hadn't expected to see what he saw in that tape, however.

After seeing the tape, he knew that whatever Team Gibbs had cooked up must be for the greater good of the world.

His only regret would be not being in MTAC watching, as well.

That afternoon, Gibbs helped Ziva into his car, trying to ignore how she held back a wince with every step she took. _It's not your fault, it's not your fault,_ he chanted in his head, like a mantra. His only consolation was knowing that the bastard that _was_ at fault would meet his end today.

He hadn't told Ziva when he found out that Vance had seen the video. It pissed him off so much, and he didn't want Ziva to have to feel that anger, or feel the terrible humiliation, again.

As she walked through the NCIS building, she tried to convince herself that no one was staring. But who was she kidding? _Everyone_ was staring. It's not everyday that two of the most kick-ass NCIS agents get kidnapped. The news had spread like wildfire.

She was just glad that they didn't know what happened to them.

Abby had managed to convince Gibbs that she should watch. She _had_ done all the hard work. Gibbs didn't want her to have to see this, but after seeing the tape, he knew she really needed to feel like there was justice in the world.

When the live feed went up on the screen, everything went silent. Tony and McGee were at the door to the apartment, guns drawn, ready to kick it down. They ignored protocol, and simply broke down the door without announcing themselves.

This guy was too easy of a target. He was relaxed on his couch, watching porn, of all things. He jumped up when the door was burst down, and drew his gun. He fired off two rounds before DiNozzo and McGee killed him, with two rounds each.

Tony fired one more through his head for good measure.

"Mission accomplished, Boss," Tony said, grinning from ear to ear.

Gibbs reached over and squeezed Ziva's hand. _It's all over, it's all okay,_ he seemed to say with that simple gesture. Ziva smiled, nodding. The lights came on overhead, and the feed went blank. Abby slowly walked over to Ziva and gave her a careful hug.

And Ziva walked out, followed by Gibbs and Abby. When she reached the bottom of the stairs, she realized something.

She hadn't told him how much it meant to her. She she turned around, and kissed Gibbs' cheek.

"Thank you, for this," she said, softly. Gibbs nodded.

"Anytime," he said. Then, all of a sudden, his smile disappeared, his happiness being replaced by unmasked hate.d

"What is it?" she asked, when she noticed Abby staring at her with a frown as well. Then she noticed they weren't staring _at _her.

They were staring past her.

"Ziva, my daughter. How nice to see you again!" came a voice from behind her.

She froze.

A/N: sorry it's so short, but I really don't have much in me today. Thanks so much for all the reviews, and I would really appreciate it if you left another!


	13. Chapter 13

It took all of Gibbs' self control to not whip out his gun and shoot Eli where he stood. How could he just _show up_, and act like everything was just dandy? Just talk to Ziva like he was her doting father? The man had some nerve.

Ziva, on the other hand, was used to this. He acted like he cared, he acted like she mattered at all to him. He acted like he'd never wronged her in any way. She hated him. She hated the control he had over her. She may not be an Israeli citizen or an officer of Mossad anymore, but he had always had this inexplicable way of controlling her. She always strived for his approval. She strived to make him proud of her, even though she knew in her heart he would never love her like he should. She would never hold that place in his heart that is solely reserved for a daughter.

He may be her biological father, but he will never be her papa. No, that place belonged to someone who would hold her when she cried, and go to the ends of the earth to protect her.

It belonged to Gibbs. Gibbs, who was currently tugging on her gently.

"Come on, you look tired. We should be gettin' home," he prompted, putting his arm around her and gently steering her away from him, and towards the elevator. She shook her head, and tried to object.

"Gibbs, let me speak to him," she said softly. "I can not be afraid of him my whole life!"

"I promised you I wouldn't let him near you. He is _near you. _I don't want you anywhere near that son of a bitch ever again."

"I can take care of myself," she argued.

"You aren't well, and you know it. I will be brutally honest with you: you can barely walk. And even if you could, the emotional toll-"

"I can face him!"

"Not here, not now. Not with the Director breathing down our necks," he whispered, jerking his head towards the cat walk. Indeed, Vance was heading towards the steps, walking to them.

"Ah, Eli. Welcome! Oh, Gibbs? Did the... operation go as planned?" he asked when he got down to them.

"Yeah, DiNozzo and McGee should be back any minute now," Gibbs said, again trying to steer Ziva away from Eli and towards the elevator.

"Are you two going to be heading home now? You still have three days of leave left," Vance asked. Gibbs rolled his eyes before calling back to him.

"Well, _yeah,_ Leon!" Gibbs said, continuing to usher Ziva into the elevator, who winced in pain when Gibbs' arm hit one of the lacerations on her back.

"You are hurt, Ziva?" Eli asked.

"No," she lied firmly, but was given away by her strange gait. She had been trying to walk without feeling that terrible, yet familiar pain in between her legs.

"Then why are you both one leave?" Eli questioned, his eyebrows raised.

"We, uh..." for once in her life, Ziva couldn't think of a lie. "We have got to go," she said, with a sense of urgency in her voice. They were in the elevator, when Vance jumped in at the last second.

"Why are you ignoring Eli?" he asked, blatantly.

"He's a sick son of a bitch," Gibbs replied, simply, slamming his finger into the garage button.

"You mind explaining?" Vance asked, looking at Ziva, who met his gaze and came to a sudden realization.

"You know!" she exclaimed, her eyes wide. Vance looked at her weirdly.

"I know what?"

"You know what... what happened!" 

"How did you-" Vance was confused.

"I see it in your eyes! The... the _pity!_" she cried. Gibbs glared at him.

"You didn't answer my other question," Vance reminded her.

"Why should I tell you what he did to me?" she cried.

"So he _did _do something to you?" Vance inquired.

"Why can you not just forget it?"

"Just tell me!" Vance insisted.

"He raped me! Over and over again! Everynight, since I was six years old! And he just _acts_ like he never did anything to me! Do you have any idea what that is_ like?_" she yelled. Vance just stared at her, his mouth agape.

He had not expected _that!_

A/N: Sorry it's short, but I really need to just ask u all a question. I was just going to post an author note, but I thought that would be cruel.

Question:

Do you think I should throw Somalia into the mix? Like make it one of her inner conflicts? I have to bring it up sometime, because it is one of the major issues she has with Eli. But we all know that she was raped in somalia, it's the blatant truth. So I feel like it was a mistake not bringing it up sooner... tell me your thoughts on this please!


	14. Chapter 14

Vance had never understood child abusers. The innocence of a child is something that should never be corrupted, never. Especially, by the person the child should trust most. As a father, he could never get why someone would hurt their children like that. His wife and kids were his whole world.

Hearing Ziva admit that this... monstrosity happened to her, hit home. He could never imagine doing something like that to Kayla. She was his little girl, his daughter. What could possess a man to use his little daughter as his _sex toy?_

His entire opinion of Eli David changed in that moment.

When he saw that tape, he could only imagine what Ziva had been feeling, what she was _still _feeling, every time she looked at Gibbs. He could only imagine Gibbs' guilt. But now, knowing that own father had raped her, he couldn't even _begin _to imagine how she is feeling now. She had been violated again and again by her biological father, the man who had never _truly_ been a father to her. And then, he shows up, less than 48 hours after her _true_ father figure was forced to rape her. Where was the justice in this world?

Vance knew he couldn't jeopardize NCIS' relationship with Mossad, but what he wouldn't _give_ at that moment to go beat the living crap out of Eli David.

How in the world had Gibbs managed to not rip off the man's head?

Leon Vance didn't know what to do, at that moment. Looking into Ziva's angry eyes, he knew the last thing she wanted was pity from him. He would say he regretted pushing her into telling her, but he was glad she told him. He wanted to know. He didn't know if he should ask her any more questions. Does he pretend it isn't effecting him like this? Or should he act out, and punch something?

All he knows, is that he is officially on Team Ziva.

"Ziva, he won't come near you again. I can make sure of that," Vance promised.

"I do not need your protection, I can take care of myself," she insisted, noticing how he used her first name.

"I don't doubt that, Agent David," Vance nodded, and stepped out of the elevator, leaving Gibbs alone with Ziva. Gibbs flipped the emergency switch.

"I am tired of running from him. I want to _face_ him, Gibbs! I am strong enough, I can do this. He has no hold over me. I am an American Citizen, and an NCIS agent. He can not do anything to me," she promised him. "You are being... overprotective."

"I don't mean to be controlling, Ziver, I just... I don't want you to get hurt. You have gotten hurt enough in the last week. And plus, I hate the bastard. He's a disgusting pervert, who hurt you. You shouldn't have to deal with him. He dumped you in the desert, he left you for dead!"

"I remember that vividly, you did not need to bring it up again-"

"He didn't even _try _to find you, Ziver! I don't want my dau- my agent getting hurt," he said, quickly covering up his mistake. But it didn't escape Ziva's notice. Her face quickly softened. She knew he saw her as a daughter, but for him to actually almost _call her_ his daughter... she must mean a whole lot to him.

She didn't deserve it.

"Gibbs..." she began, bewildered, tears coming to her eyes. "I do not deserve-"

"You deserve everything he didn't give you, and a hell of a lot more. You didn't do anything to "deserve" otherwise," he insisted. She shook her head.

"He was never a father. He is dead to me. But... I want to face him, Gibbs. Even though I know I wont get it, I just want him to show a little remorse for what he did to me and... to me!" she cried, covering up her mistake so quick Gibbs wasn't even sure she had had a slip of the tongue. "I just want to know he feels even the smallest bit of regret for all he did to me. Is... is that too much to ask?" she asked, getting choked up.

"It shouldn't matter what he feels-"

"I _know_ it should not, but it _does!_ No matter what he does, he will always be my father. And I will always want him to love me," she cried, shutting her eyes tight.

A lone tear leaked out.

"Ziver, look at me," Gibbs ordered. Ziva opened her eyes, but didn't meet his. He sighed and reached out, taking her head in his hands.

"I love you. Tony, Tim, Abby, Ducky, and Palmer love you. Hell, I'm beginning to think even _Vance _is growing fond of you! You are loved, by your _true_ family," he assured her, wiping away her tear.

"Oh, please, all Vance feels is pity. It will pass," she chuckled dryly, slyly avoiding the matter at hand. But Gibbs knew better than to let her change the subject.

"I think you are right, Ziva. This will not just go away. You won't be able to be happy until you confront Eli. You need to get this out of your system," Gibbs told her. She smiled a little.

"Thank you."

"Anytime. But wait, Ziva, I need to ask you something," he said softly. Her eyes became suspicious.

"What is it?" she asked, warily.

"Your little... slip of the tongue a few minutes ago... yeah, I noticed it. And I know I didn't imagine it. Ziver, _who else did Eli David hurt?_" he asked, taking her hand.

"I... I can not..." she began, but her voice just seemed to stop working.

"You can tell me. You can trust me with anything," he assured her.

"They are both dead now, so I guess they can't get mad at me," she whispered to herself.

"Both?" he asked, "There were two?" Ziva sighed, defeated.

"Tali. He hurt Tali," she cried, and buried her head in his shoulder.

"You said there were two," he pointed out.

"There were! _Both _Tali's! I... oh god, I tried to protect her! I took all his anger for her, but sometimes it just wasn't enough... he hurt her sometimes too, Gibbs! Each night, he would remind me of our deal... That if I was a good girl that night, he would spare Tali. If I screamed... he would tie me to a chair and bring in Tali and make me watch as he... as he raped her... knowing it was my fault, _knowing_ it was because I was not strong enough..." she sobbed, her voice becoming a hoarse whisper at the end. Gibbs felt his anger towards Eli escalate, if possible.

"What do you mean... _both_ Tali's?" he asked.

"I... I was only twelve! I was so young, not even a teenager... He made me tell everyone that I had slept with my boyfriend... She was my light, Gibbs! She and Tali were the only things in my life that kept me from just putting myself out of my misery... So... so when she was born, I named her after Tali. Then... a week later... Eli... he... h-" Ziva was cut off by a frame-wracking sob.

"What did he do, Ziva?" he asked, almost afraid of the answer.

"He killed her! My own father... he came in a week after I had given birth and he tried to rape me again... I fought back, I did not want him to hurt me anymore... but he picked my little Tali out of her crib and he snapped her neck! Oh god, Gibbs, I will never forget the noise... the crack... my baby, gone forever..." she sobbed, and no longer being able to hold herself up anymore, she collapsed in Gibbs arms.

Gibbs felt as if her was going to be sick.

"I need to face him, Gibbs. I am as ready as I will ever be. Let me... let me do this now, please!" she practically begged. Gibbs nodded.

"If you are sure you are ready," he agreed. She looked up to him, thankfulness in her eyes. "You do know you don't need my permission, right?" he asked. She nodded.

"Can we wait a little while, though?" she asked.

"Of course. We can stay here as long as you want," he assured her, sinking down to the floor. She smiled, and sat down next to him, laying her head on his shoulder.

"Thanks. For everything," she said.

"Always. Eli is an evil bastard. He raped you, killed your child, and sent you off to die."

"The sending me off to die part was not really a surprise. I am, I _was_,an embarrassment. He just wanted me out of the way. So I could no longer embarrass him. I do not think he expected me to live through it. Hell, _I_ did not expect to live through it," she sighed, remembering that dark summer, full of pain and torture.

"You never talk about it," Gibbs pointed out.

"There is nothing to say. Saleem only inflicted pain upon me that I have felt before. Most of it... most was inflicted by Eli, prior to my capture in Somalia. It was part of our training, or so he said. When Saleem and his men raped me... all I could see was Eli. Their torture techniques... He staged my "kidnapping" when I was 18. He had a couple of officers put me in a room and interrogate me on Mossad operations. They wanted to see how long it would take me to break. I was subjected to every method of torture Mossad had ever used... except for rape. No, Eli took care of that when I came home that night. He hadn't laid a hand on me since I had come back from the training camp, but he did that night. It was the last time he raped me, ever. He has not done it since."

"Wait, he had you kidnapped and _tortured?"_

"He was watching the live feed in the next room," she confirmed, giving him a nod. Gibbs felt his blood boil.

"What I wouldn't give to put that son of a bitch in a room and torture him to death, like he and Saleem did to you."

"He is not responsible for Saleem's actions," she reminded him.

"No, but he was the reason you ended up in that hell-hole," Gibbs said.

"That is true."

"Why haven't you mentioned it before?" Gibbs asked. Ziva looked at him, puzzled.

"Mentioned what?"

"Somalia had to have been... traumatizing. You have had nightmares about Eli recently, but not about Saleem. Why is that?"

"I... I do not know. I guess because Somalia was a walk in the park, compared to what Eli did to me. The interrogation, the gang rapes, the miscarriage... nothing was as bad as knowing it was being done to you by your own father."

"Wait, you_ miscarried_ in Somalia?" Gibbs asked, eyes wide. Ziva sighed, realizing she had failed to mention this earlier.

"Yes, about a week before you showed up. All I remember was pain and blood, lots and lots of blood," she said, looking downward. Gibbs wrapped his arm around her shoulders comfortingly.

"Ziva, just tell me when you are ready to face him, and we will. Just say the word."

"I think I am ready, Gibbs," she said. "But I need to do this on my own. You can be there, just... let me do all the talking, okay?" she pleaded. Gibbs gave her shoulder a squeeze.

"Of course," he replied, and kissed the top of her head. "I will be there for you if you need me," he reminded her. She smiled.

"You always have been," she said. Gibbs laughed, and flipped the emergency switch.

It was time.

A/N: sorry for leaving you on that little cliffie! As you can see, I decided to integrate Somalia into the story. This chapter had a lot of revelations, so please tell me what you think of them! I cried when I wrote the part about Tali, it was hard to write. Most of this chapter was. So please please review!


	15. Chapter 15

As Ziva walked out of the elevator doors, she could feel her adrenaline pumping. She had waited her whole life to do this, to be able to confront the man who made her childhood a living hell, without fear of repercussion. She would do so, with her mentor at her side, the one man who had truly been a father to her.

It was too easy. Eli was standing exactly where they had left him, right by the large window near the squadroom. Gibbs stayed a distance behind her, knowing this was her battle. As much as it killed him to just stand here and do nothing, he knew that this was her fight, and she must fight it alone.

At least for now.

"Ah, my daughter. Have you changed your mind about talking to me?" Eli asked, extending his arms for a hug. Ziva stayed where she was, her death glare unwavering.

"I am not your daughter," she replied, shaking her head.

"What do you mean? I am your father!" Eli stated. Ziva could tell he was on the verge of getting very angry with her.

"You were never a father to me," she said simply.

"You do _not_ talk to your father like that! You do _not_ speak that way to your _Director!"_

"In case you have not noticed, _Eli,_ Leon Vance is my Director now. I am no longer a citizen of Israel, nor am I an officer of Mossad. You have no hold on me," she replied, calmly. Gibbs smiled to himself. She was so brave. He was throughly impressed that she has been able to keep her calm. He just hopes it will last.

"I am first and foremost your father, Ziva! It would not matter if you are a citizen of _Iraq_, you are my daughter first!"

"Really? Because the way I remember it, Mossad always came before me!"

"That is not true!"

"Oh really? You cared for your job more than you did for me! A father does not use his daughter like a pawn!"

"Ziva-" Eli started, but was interrupted.

"A _father_ does not rape his daughter every single night of her childhood! A _father_ does not get his daughter pregnant, than kill the baby! A _father_ does not have his child kidnapped and tortured! A _father_ does not send his daughter off to die in the desert!" Ziva yelled. At this point, everybody within earshot had turned their heads. Ziva knew that meant everybody she cared about knew what Eli had done to her, but at the moment, she really didn't give a crap.

Eli's face was full of rage. He took a step towards her, and before she could react, he backhanded her with all the force he could muster. Stifling a surprised cry, she fell to the ground, her lip bleeding.

Gibbs lost it. He ran forward, and grabbed Eli's wrist, slapping on handcuffs. He didn't bother being gentle with him.

"You are under arrest for assaulting a federal agent. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be held against you in the court of law. You have the right to an att-" Gibbs began reading the man his miranda rights, but was interrupted.

"You can not do this! I am the director of Mossad! You can not arrest me!" Eli cried, struggling. Tony and McGee, who had arrived right before Ziva faced her father, rushed to their aid. Gibbs handed Eli off to McGee, telling him to put him in interrogation. Tony and Gibbs both went to Ziva's side and helped her up.

"Do you want some ice for that?" Tony asked. He was outraged at what he had heard, and what Ziva had confessed Eli had done to her. But he knew she would never want their pity, so he tried to act as though everything was normal.

"No, I am fine," she insisted. Gibbs nodded.

"Do you want to go home now?" he asked. She nodded.

"I have faced him, that is all I wanted to do. But Gibbs, Eli has diplomatic immunity. You are not going to be able to charge him with assault-"

"I know that. I just want to be able to put him in a room, alone. DiNozzo, take Ziva back to my place, watch a movie or something. You and Tim have the rest of the day off. I'll be back there soon, I need to take care of some... business first," he said, winking at Ziva. Ziva smirked, and followed Tony out without argument.

…

Gibbs opened the door to the interrogation room that Eli was in, slamming it behind him.

"You know, it's pretty hot in here. Is it just me, or what?" Gibbs smirked, taking off his jacket and hanging it over the video camera.

"I do not know what you hope to accomplish Agent Gibbs. I have diplomatic immunity, you can not charge me with assault," Eli stated. 

"I know that. That's not why I'm here," Gibbs replied.

"Then why?"

"Oh I think you know why."

"Ziva."

"Yeah, Eli, Ziva. Ziva, the intelligent, funny, beautiful young woman that you terrorized when she was a child. When she was _your child._ I don't get you, Eli. You had everything I ever wanted, and you threw it away! Not only did you throw it away, but you broke it! You _raped_ her, Eli! You were never her father! She never had one, not until she came here!"

"You are such a hypocrite, Agent Gibbs."

"Oh yeah? How?"

"You get mad at _me_ for raping her. You say you are like a father to her. And yet, you raped her just the other day, am I right?" Eli asked, raising his eyebrows. Gibbs froze.

"How the _hell_ did you find out about that! Vance? I swear, I will kill-"

"Not Vance. I have my sources, Agent Gibbs. Mossad is a powerful organization. But that does not matter. What matters is that you can not get mad at me for doing that to her, because you did it yourself," Eli said. Gibbs roared in anger, and grabbed the man's suit, pinning him to the wall.

"I had no _choice. _I would _never _hurt Ziva just _because!_ Hereis what you are going to do. You are going to leave America, the second you finish discussing whatever the hell you needed to discuss with Vance. You are never going to contact Ziva again. You are going to stay the hell away from us, or I will _kill you_ and dispose of your body where no one will ever find it. Okay?" Gibbs growled, shoving him aside. Eli gave him a death glare, and fixed his tie, before walking out of interrogation to go speak with Vance. Gibbs took a deep breath, and retrieved his jacket before heading towards the garage to go home.

…

Eli growled in frustration, kicking the orange walls. He had no idea where he was, he was lost in the basement of NCIS. He rounded another corner, before hearing music blaring from a couple corridors down form him. He followed the music, and arrived at an open door. It appeared to be the lab. A woman he recognized faintly was standing at her computer, working on a fingerprint match and typing furiously. Her clothing was most unusual. She was wearing a black skull tank top, 2 inch platforms, and spiked bracelets, her hair in pigtails. Eli walked up behind her, hoping to be able to ask her how the hell to get to Vance's office. He cleared his throat, and the Goth woman whirled around. Upon recognition, the woman's face filled with rage, and before he could stop her, she had punched him. He was surprised at the woman's strength.

"_That_ was for raping my best friend and ruining her childhood!" she growled. Right after that, he felt something cold and wet and sticky being poured on him. He looked up at the woman, who shoved the now-empty cup of Caf-Pow at him.

"_That_ was for killing her baby and having her kidnapped!" she stated. Then, for good measure, kneed him in the groin.

"And _that _was for sending her off to die, and almost taking her from me," she finished.Eli was now hunched over in pain and soaked in red and sticky Caf-Pow.

"Now get the hell out of my lab," she said, roughly shoving him out her door, shutting it and locking it. She whirled around, and smirked, before getting back to work.

…

Eli had been glad that when the Goth woman shoved him out her door, an elevator was right there. He _wasn't_ glad, however, that he was soaked in Caf-Pow, his white hair blood-red. Shivering, he approached Vance's office, ignoring the stares and the laughing. As he passed by Cynthia and entered Vance's office, he heard her whisper, "Oh, Abby," and laugh softly.

It was possible Eli David was the most hated man in the building right now. Even the geeks down in Cyber Crimes seemed to know about what Eli had done to Ziva, the news had spread like wildfire. He just hoped his relationship with Vance wouldn't be severed. Being and ally to NCIS was something Mossad could not afford to lose.

Eli hadn't realized how many people at NCIS were loyal to Ziva. Most of them seemed like they would give their life for her. He did not understand it, but all he knew was that he needed to watch his back as long as he was in this building.

"Ah, Eli. I see Abby got to you. Red suits you," Vance said, stifling a laugh.

"Let's just get down to business, Leon," Eli sighed. Vance nodded, smirking.

Ah, sweet revenge.

A/N: Tehe. I had _fun_ writing this chapter. Is that wrong? Nah I dont think it is. Please review, pretty please! Thank you ZivaFan2481, Nahau Moondust, ChEmMiE, and NYCRhythm0617 for reviewing the last chapter!

Also, I need your opinion on something. Should I have one of the bad guys who was working for Daniels still be alive, and Ziva and Gibbs have to testify against him? Or should I just end it? If you have ideas, please tell me!


	16. Chapter 16

A/N: it has been so long, and I really have no excuse. Sorry. I had no idea this would be the last chapter of this story! Never fear, there is a sequel on it's way:)

Ziva growled and flipped her phone closed for the seventh time. It was Eli again. Each time he left _another_ threatening voicemail. She had made the mistake of actually listening to the first. She sighed as she flipped open her phone and listening to his latest message.

"_You ungrateful little bitch! I raise you, and take care of you, and feed you, and _this_ is how you repay me? This is the _seventh _time I have called you! You realize I could lose my _job_ over this? I need to talk to you, face to face. Unless you are too cowardly and weak to meet me by yourself. You have to have Gibbsy to protect you, huh, you gutless whore! Now answer your damn phone, we need to talk!" _Eli yelled at her in hebrew. She squeezed her eyes shut. She did not want to admit it, but he was getting to her. She just really needed to talk to him, face to face. _Without_ Gibbs. Even though she appreciated what he was doing for her, this was her fight. She knew that, in his mind, he will owe her forever, but she does not want him to wait on her hand and foot for the rest of her life. Really all she wanted was for life to go back to normal.

But she knows life will never go back to normal. She doesn't even know what normal _is_ anymore.

Making up her mind she flips open her phone and dials her father's phone number. He picked up on the first ring.

"It is about time you called me back! I have been-" 

"Skip the small talk, Eli. Meet me at the Starbucks near NCIS in one hour. Come alone," she demanded and hung up before he could say anything else. She smiled, feeling accomplished. The hard part was over. She knew that Eli wouldn't dare attack her in a public place, and he would probably keep his voice down. They would have to remain civil, and that is all Ziva wanted. She was also afraid that _she_ might lose it if they were alone.

She knew Gibbs would be furious with her, but she didn't care. She needed to do this, in order to feel some kind of closure. She knew he couldn't truly be brought to justice for what he did, the statute of limitations was well over. But she doesn't care. She just wants him to know that he is no longer a part of her life. She is cutting him loose.

She will make sure he knows how much he hurt her. She will make sure he knows how much pain he caused her, and Tali, and the other Tali whose life had been brutally ended just weeks after it had began. She will make him realize all she went through when he had dumped her in Somalia.

So she set out, determined to make him sorry for what he did to her.

…

She arrived a half an hour earlier than she was supposed to, but she simply could not wait. She did not expect Eli to be there already.

"You are early," she stated.

"So are you. You look nervous, my darling," he replied.

"Oh, do not _darling_ me. I was never your _darling_," she hissed. Eli sighed.

"So we are back to this?"

"Eli, you ruined my childhood! My teenage years! You _killed_ my daughter! _Our _daughter!"

"Her very existence was against nature!"

"Then maybe you shouldn't have raped me!" she cried.

"When you say it like that it sound so bad," he sighed. Ziva narrowed her eyes.

"It _is_ bad! You led me to believe it was _normal_ for fathers to hurt their daughters like that! Do you realize how _messed up_ I could have turned out?"

"I was only concerned for your future-"

"So instead you took away my present? I do not understand you, or how your mind works. Then again, pedophiles tend to be a little... _psychotic_," she insulted. He pulled back.

"How dare you call me-" 

"You _are_ a pedophile, Eli! You are no better than the perverts we put behind bars!" 

"First of all, it is "father" or "Director" to you, not _Eli!_" he insisted. She growled.

"I left Mossad. I left Israel. You are not my director. Leon Vance is my director. And when have you _ever_ acted like a father to me? Last time I saw you, you sent me off to the desert to be tortured to death!" she yelled, standing up.

"I expected you to complete the mission! It is your fault you failed!" he stood up as well, leaning over the table.

"I was going up against thirty heavily armed men with nothing but a handgun and a couple knifes, Eli!"

"Again with the Eli!"

"You are not my father, anymore. Father's do not violate their children like that, then send them off to die. And you are _not_ my director!" Ziva fumed. 

"I guess this would be a bad time to request your return to Israel, then?" he questioned. Her eyes widened.

"Nothing get's through to you, does it?" she yelled, exasperated.

"Ziva, you need to come home. Gibbs betrayed you, don't you remember what he did to you a couple days ago in that cabin? How he violated you?" 

"I can not believe you would bring that up! Gibbs only did that because he had to! He comforted me afterwards, _you_ never did! You just threw my nightgown back at me and left!"

"Oh please, you were unconscious! How would you have known?"

"But he _did! _You know he did!"

"He gave you his sweatshirt and sang you a children's song about a mockingbird, yes?" he informed her. She froze.

The video tape hadn't had audio. Even if Mossad managed to get their hands on a copy of that video, how would they have known what Gibbs said to her while she was unconcious.

She stood up, grabbing her car keys, and stormed out the door, leaving Eli standing alone at the coffee table.

As he looked around, he realized all the eyes in the shop were watching him. At least they had been speaking in hebrew, or else he would be in big trouble.

…

Ziva walked into Abby's lab. The scientist was twirling around in her chair when she spotted Ziva. She stumbled dizzily to her and flung her arms around her.

"Oh, Ziva, I heard what he did to you, I am so sorry," she said softly. Ziva just hugged her back, in need of comfort right now.

"It is okay. We can not change the past," she replied. Abby pulled back.

"He came here, you know. He came to my lab looking for directions a couple hours ago."

"What did you do?" Ziva asked, her eyes wide. Abby gave her a proud smile.

"I punched him. Then poured my Caf-Pow on him. Then kicked him in his balls," she grinned. Ziva laughed.

"Thank you, Abby."

"Only problem is, now I'm out of Caf-Pow. I already drank my spare," she said musingly.

"I will go get you a Caf-Pow if you and McGee do something for me," Ziva promised her.

"Anything," Abby assured her.

"Could you check out that video again? See if it was being broadcasted to anyone? I think there was someone who saw an audio version," she requested. Abby looked puzzled, but nodded anyway.

"I'll call Timmy," she said, picking up her phone. Ziva gave her a friendly smile and a thank you, before heading out to the Caf-Pow machine.

When she returned, Abby and McGee were standing side by side, a solemn look in their faces. Ziva's face fell, and she put the Caf-Pow on the evidence table.

"Ziva... we have some news, and you might not like it," Tim said sadly.

"Just tell me, I can handle it," she promised.

"Ziva, the video was being broadcasted live. We were able to trace the signal-" 

"The point, Tim?" Ziva asked, eager to just hear what he had to say.

"We traced the signal back to an encrypted laptop in Tel Aviv," he said, sadly. Ziva exhaled and closed her eyes, putting her hand on the table for support.

"We don't know it was him, Ziva, it could be someone else-" Abby began trying to comfort her, but Ziva held up her hand.

"It was him. It was my father," she said, softly.

And she broke down.

TO BE CONTINUED...

A/N: Sorry about he cliffhanger:) I am going to continue this in another story, I will probably post it soon! Thank you so much to everyone who reviewed this story, ever! Each and every review means a lot!

The sequel to this will be called "Closure," for those who would like to read it:)

Until next time,

Alli


	17. Chapter 17

**I posted the first chapter of the sequel, Closure. Please read and review! Don't skip the author's note because it is important.**

**Alli**


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